The Ship Be Sinking

Mouth Almighty

I Need a Portmanteau of “Ridiculous” and “Delicious”…Ridiculicious?

Mariusz Pudzianowski’s MMA debut

Gonna get this out of my system now, bear with me:

BLAST THICKNECK! SMASH MANMOUNTAIN! BUTCH BEARCLAW! THICK HUGETRUNK! CLINT FORKLIFT! SLAB BULKHEAD! MASS SQUATSLAM! BONK BIGCHEST! CRUNCH THICKPECS! ABS MCBIGBODY! LANCE STORM! No, wait, uh… POLISH BROCKALIKE! BRAD MANSMASH! FIST BIGARMS! BULK BENCHPRESS! HULK LEGKICKS! CRASH IRONROD! AX NONECK! CARL VAN HUGETORSO! ROLL FIZZLEBEEF!

LOOK at this fucking guy. He’s a giant pile of only-in-Japan who looks like some kind of sci-fi movie costume, or possibly prop. I have seen it, and I still don’t entirely believe this man exists. Terrifying. And yet, less so than the subnormals in the 5 Ounces of Lame thread who are trying to talk this guy up as “ready for Brock”. Yeah, sure, if he attacks him in his hospital bed with 5 or 6 friends maybe. It’s almost as if MMA is actually getting weirder at the same time as it’s getting more mainstream, as though everyone knows about it now but not everyone has learned that like bathing suits it’s not for everyone.

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December 12, 2009 - Posted by | MMA

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